Knock on Wood

Usual ups and downs, but I've been pleased with how I balanced writing and life over the last two weeks.  I'm not going to meet my goal of finishing Episode 1 of Kitty City this month.  I have 6,000 words towards the 30,000 goal for the episode.  I'm making good progress on Polar Bear on the Loose, and Cat Gerlach, completely out of the blue, sent me a possible cover -- it's awesome.  And I'm continuing work on 129 Amselstrasse, trying to get it to a publishable point.  Thank you, Stephen, for your invaluable assistance.

Mr. L wants me to give him attention, and he's been pretty adamant about it.  It's not a completely unreasonable request, but I'm still not happy about it.  I have to continue to navigate the path between the electronic work that calls me and the human who wishes to spend undivided time with me. 

The Gentle Yoga class has been good.  The teacher has this machine that supposedly reads anti-oxidant levels from your skin.  Healthy is supposed to be in the 75,000 range. My reading came back at 19,000.  The goal, of course, besides having a healthy reading, is to sell vitamin supplements.  I'm leery of this.  A high school friend had been selling this a couple years ago, and I hadn't heard much from her recently about this product, so I asked her.  She believes the product is no better or worse than what can be purchased at GNC.  I am toying with the idea of trying some of Stephen's shakes or smoothies.  I don't have anything as fancy as Stephen's Nutribullet, but my step daughter gave us something similar about ten years ago, and I haven't found a use for it yet.  I keep thinking I should try it.  Have you tried ice to get a more shake-like or Icee-like consistency, Stephen?

Mr. L finished his project on the front of the house -- replacing drip rail and the bottom board of siding and painting to the bottom of the windows.  It looks good -- as all his work does.  He is more and more easily exhausted from work that used to be easy for him.  I know this contributes to his nearly constant angry state of being these days, but I don't seem to be able to discuss it directly with him nor find a way to alleviate his anxiety.  I told him the other day he should be nicer to himself, because he deserves it, but he won't.  He must have a powerful internal negative monologue.  I've heard a little of it, and it makes me sad for him.  He's such a gifted person, but someone drilled into him at a young age that he was an idiot, and that's what he's fighting (my impression -- I could be totally wrong).  Sure, he produces wonderfully skilled work as a result to prove whomever (clearly long dead) wrong, but at what cost to himself?

The Week Ahead:

• Continue work on Kitty City, PBOTL, and 129 Amselstrasse
• Get trees trimmed back from the roof of the house
• Get grass planted and watered in; mow lawn
• Go to yoga class
• Get cats (and me) safely back to Central TX

Double CoPay Monday

I have two medical (ish) visits Monday. Counselor and my pre-surgery physical. Supposedly they're checking to make sure my heart and lungs can manage the surgery (since I don't have any medical issues for either, I don't think it'll be a problem) but I am concerned there will be some stupid little thing. Sinus infection. 5 lbs over the weight limit. Cyst has moved. Who knows. Something to postpone this stupid thing a little longer.

Assuming my BP, heart and lung sounds, etc, are acceptable, next Wednesday I'm off to get surgered. Starting to get nervous about it. Maybe I should ask if I can get a tummy tuck at the same time? ;)

Mom seems to be doing better, which is encouraging.

Weight's up, mostly because I have a bad case of the 'I don't give a flips' and I'm HONGRY. Struggling to stay on track. Gah.  Been walking regularly again, though, tracking, etc. Hopefully I'll have a loss this week. I sure could use one, since I was just 1 lb below my start weight!! Grr!

Screenplay is running really, really LONG. I've reached the end of the beginning. I should be around page 20, ish, and I'm on page 36, nearly twice as many pages as I'm supposed to have.  Struggling to trim and condense and show action and, maaan, this is a whole different beast. I don't want to get further in until I figure out how to do it. Much rather fight one section than the whole dang thing.

My talk with the writing group in Des Moines went great, which was a relief. I haven't done one in a long time and felt a little rusty and nervous.

Family is fine. LittleMiss is with us this weekend and she's exhausting but delightful. We went to two county fairs on Thursday and saw lots of livestock. She really loves chickens. It's cute. :)

I guess that's about it for me. I hope you all have a grand a glorious week. {{hugs}}

Blackbirds, NutriBullet, & 15 Writers

These sum up my week: Blackbirds, NutriBullet®, and 15 writers.

I worked with Wendy, Jean, Gail, and Kent on stories and poems for Blackbirds. All of which were good experiences. I always learn a lot when I work with another writer.

I went whole hog -- so to speak -- in using my NutriBullet® 900 Pro to create breakfast and lunch smoothies out of spinach, bananas, blueberries, carrots, tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, sunflower seeds, celery, raisins, apples, strawberries, lettuces, and any other green, non-starchy veggies in my house. Amazingly enough, the shakes have made my blood pressure and my blood sugar go down. I haven't felt hungry. And I think, overall, I've had more energy and less problems. We'll see how I feel about it after a month on it.

And I prepared the last presentation for the Summer Novel Writing Course for the writing group. Fifteen writers were in attendance Saturday to hear me go over the slides as well as win books, CDs, notebooks, and journals during the meeting. I gave away 13 books (most of them purchased over the past three months at the dollar store) but also gave as the grand prize two of my books and a writing book that had figured prominently in the past three presentations. They seemed to really enjoy the presentation and the drawings. Also, they sang Happy Birthday to me, and one of the members had made birthday cupcakes for all of us. A good friend at the meeting gave me a pen and a funny birthday card. Wendy stopped by (via Skype) and let me work on that. Thanks, Wendy! It's my hope to be able to use Skype to have writers give programs to the group. We still have some problems to work out.

And that was mostly my week, other than working on the family newsletter and having one really really really bad medical night that I have recovered from.

This week:
- Tomorrow Wendy and I will go over the final edit of "The Third Wish," her third short story for Blackbirds.
- Wednesday is my birthday as well as an afternoon reception for a friend who is retiring from the local library after 28 years.
- I will work with Kent or Jean, depending on who turns in their short story first, or maybe both or neither as it works out.
- I intend to finish the family newsletter and mail it this week.
- I want to finish my short story for Blackbirds and get it in shape to be edited by Wendy, Jean, or Gail, or all three, or a combination of two as it works out.
- And a few pages on Murder by the Mile would be nice.

That's what I'm planning for. What are you planning for? Whatever it is, I hope it's a good week.

Quiet Snoopy Dance

Good news! It appears the ex is moving out. We had to agree in writing not to sue him for back rent, so we stipulated that he has to be out by August 15 and not cause damage. We're quietly hopeful that the situation will soon be resolved and not telling family yet. Don't want to jinx it. Also, Vicky's court case has been continued. Unless her lawyer (yes, she got one at practically the last possible minute) can get it dismissed altogether, they'll go back to court August 28. Apparently, the former land lord was very surprised to see her with legal counsel. Wish I had been there!

I've gotten some writing done. Writing The Third Wish for Blackbirds helped get my mojo going a little again, so I've started on Weeping Willow again. I feel very tentative about it, like I'm not really sure I'm doing it right. I'm over-thinking, I know. In some ways I feel like it was a mistake to take all the advanced writing classes. I made some good contacts and learned cool stuff, but I feel like it's really blunted the edge of what I was doing by instinct. I can't help but wonder if Hemingway ever doubted himself like I do.

I was cleaning up my desktop the other day and found my 2014 goal list. I'm so far behind. It's almost August and haven't marked anything off. Well, I could rationalize that I've pitched three stories since Stephen has a publishing company, but it wasn't what I intended when I made the list. Then again, if I decide to self-pub again it would count. Mostly when I think about that list it just makes me tired.

Overall, things are looking up. I've been controlling food pretty well, exercise sort of well. I told stories at an MS Support Group last Wednesday. I got up in front of them and the next thing I knew, an hour had passed. Plus I got cheap parking! Bonus! I have two more stories, bits of stuff I've written, that I'm adapting for storytelling. Jeff will be back mid-August and I hope to have at least one ready to tell him.

So I think that's about it. This week I need to write some more, but I also need to get some organizing done. I have piles on my desk again, but the desk is smaller than the one I used to have. There's more nesting coming on. Y'all have a good week!

Not my circus, not my monkeys

Apparently, the upheaval of the last nine months has resulted in the ability to think things through better. I've been trying to embrace the 'not my circus, not my monkeys' philosophy. It's harder because it's Vicky's circus. The ex is the biggest part of the problem, but she told us last Wednesday their former landlord is suing them, and the court date is tomorrow. She still doesn't have a lawyer.

Not my circus, not my monkeys. Not yet, at least. Unless there's a miracle and the ex starts taking some personal responsibility, we will likely have to hire a lawyer to evict him. He says he has nowhere else to go, which I have no trouble believing since he's spent the best part of the last seven years sponging off friends and family, and no one wants to go there again, not even his parents. The hardest part is keeping our involvement to phone consultations for now. Well, that and not going off on him via text. He got nasty when I reminded him they're behind on rent.

I have gotten some good stuff for my emotion journal from all of this!

Other than that, things are quiet here. The apartment is almost back to normal and we have a couple weeks of downtime before there is anything more than a blip on the calendar. While the Boys were here I was more mindful of my eating, so I didn't gain weight like I usually do. Walking about 12 miles in 3 days helped a lot, too. I'm focusing on nutrition and exercise more now that it's going to be quiet for a while. Need to shed a few pounds. Nothing new there.

On the plus side, the weather is supposed to be great the next few days. I'm planning on taking some longer walks to explore a little further afield. I really need to get back to writing, too. There's the mission for this week.

Insert clever but meaningful title here

Had the writing group meeting Saturday. My program "Plot: Who Done What" seemed to go over well. Next meeting will be "House: Plot and Structure," which will end my Summer Novel Writing Course. I've enjoyed doing this mini-course, but it's been hard work. Learned a lot and hope I taught them a lot, but who knows? All any presenter can do is put the information out there, tell them where to find more information, and hope they incorporate it into their craft. What would be really wonderful is if they went out and learned new things and then came back and shared them with us.

Been working more on Blackbirds. Going to have to reject an item from a friend. Not looking forward to that, but it doesn't have the dark, Gothic, twisty feel that the other pieces do. The book itself has some truly creepy moments in it. I don't know if I can get people to read it when it's published, but there's good reading in it if they do.

And not sure when it will be published. I'm short of material. I have 54 pages and need at least 46 more. Fifty-six would be better. I'm looking for a short story from GH. And another short story from KB. A short story from me. And I would REALLY REALLY REALLY like a short story from Jean. She has a good, creepy idea in "Diver," but I don't think it's inspiring her. I'm still hopeful, though.

Health has been a bit better. I've been fighting a summer cold, but maybe I'm on top of that. Will be seeing the doctor sometime soon. Maybe next week. Need to see my appointment book to be sure. I know it's not this week.

Murder by the Mile ... oh lord of writing, you'd better bless me soon. I want this book finished this year. I need to finish a book. I need to prove to myself that I still have it in me, the ability to hold a world in my imagination.

This week I will do:
- Household chores.
- Publish the family newsletter and be on time for once.
- Work on Blackbirds.
- Walk 15 minutes a day.
- Work on the program for the next writers group meeting.
- Some other stuff I can't think of right now.

Anyway, have a good week!

Still stumbling along

Things are going well, other than LittleMiss has been at her dad's all week and I miss her terribly. I'm ready for her to be back home, and I get to pick her up Tuesday.

Took my daughter and a young friend of mine - now also a friend of hers, yay! - to lunch and a movie today. Was really fun to get out, just us girls, and do something. I spend too much time either at home or doing the things I'm 'supposed to do', whether grocery shopping, Dr visits, whatever, instead of things I enjoy. Anyway, I had fun. We saw Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, which I liked, but didn't love, if that makes sense. My company was more fun than the movie.

Writing is writing, coming in fits and starts. Been working on it daily, but I can't say that I'm making tons of progress. I keep hitting little snags. Currently, I'm working on the various people in Albin Darril's assassination/extraction team. I supposed technically they're a 'squad' of thirteen total people, including Albin (technically too big for a squad, but it's my book and it's not modern earth human history), but I'm having a little trouble deciding what all they can and cannot do, as a team and as individual members, especially as things are about to go BOOM! around and through them in a very big way. Despite the massive casts of my stories, I'm not used to writing scenes with 13 specific people in them. It's proving a little tricky.

I didn't have any interesting writing news this week that I can recall, other than some back and forth emails with my agent over last week's developments. She seems to be of the opinion that I ought to go ahead and write the screenplay. The local bookstore doesn't have any books on screenplay writing, but I'll be in DM on Tues to get LittleMiss, so I'll go to Half Price Books and maybe Barnes and Noble to find something.

Weight was up a smidge last week, but this week I'm back to tracking and have resumed exercising, so that's good. Baby steps.

My Mutinous Cyst surgery is scheduled for Aug 6. No idea what time yet. Still waiting to hear when I'll have my sinuses repaired.

In other medical news, my mother isn't doing great. She keeps having mini strokes and she's forgetting things. I'll see her when I'm in DM on Tuesday.

I keep thinking there's more to mention, but I can't remember anything else right now. Need to finish this scene I'm stalled on and go to bed. Planning on sewing all day Monday, which will be lovely. I have too many quilts I should have finished last year, let alone current ones. {{hugs}} and have a great week!

Hot Blooded

At least it feels as if my blood is boiling about two-thirds of the time.  Supposedly, these are menopausal hot flashes, but they sure don't flash.  I feel like I'm on fire, sweat pours from my pores, and my skin itches.  Sleeping with the ceiling fan on and just my feet covered seems to help.  I spend most of the night throwing covers off and pulling them back on.

A couple of weeks ago, everything hurt, so I downloaded an app to map my pain (I'm always amazed when I think of something I'd like to track, go looking for an app, and find one that does what I wanted).  Since then, my pain has receded to normal levels.  I'm lucky that the pain I complain about so much maxes out at around a 4 or 5 on a scale of ten and normally is around two or three.

Is that enough whining?  Too much? 

I sat down to assemble the deer feeder and discovered the legs were missing.  The angle pieces that connect the legs to the feeder were there.  The feet were there, but the legs are missing. I put everything back in the box and loaded the box in the truck to take back to San Antonio with me to exchange.

I had a reasonably productive writing week.  I tracked about eight hours of work, but I forgot to log in Timesheeter several times.  I have almost two thousand words on Kitty City.  I finished Lesson 19 of How To Revise Your Novel.  I'm preparing to begin Lesson 20, which is the final lesson before type in and, as Holly puts it, the last pass through the novel with a net.  I'll be working on scene beginnings and endings, pacing, and weeding out any step-by-step problems which remain (Johnny awoke with the alarm, got out of bed, brushed his teeth....).  I have a note to decide how to standardize depiction of Inuit's thoughts and ultra low frequency conversations.  I need to fix the timeline.

I finally found my ancient writings.  A lot of it was total dreck from high school, but my three poems from 1991 that I liked back then were in the stack as well, and I still liked them.  I typed them into electronic form and passed them along to Stephen who liked two of them for Blackbirds.  He liked the third, but it wasn't dark enough -- just miserably sad.  A big surprise was two poems from the mid-70s that seemed hopeful.  Stephen thought they could be combined into a single poem and would fit the needs of the anthology, so we worked to revise that and got it to a suitable state.  I even found the essence of a short story from 2003, but I think it will require more work than I'm interested in at this time to make it suitable. I may play with it over the next couple of weeks.  We'll see.

I accomplished about half the items noted I wanted to get done this week.  Analyzing the imagery captured by the game camera on the side porch has been interesting.  Big Gray has returned, so Sneaky no longer has midnight snacks left in the feeder.  Unfortunately, during the time food was remaining overnight in the feeder, a local skunk has taken to visiting.  I've captured it two nights in a row at around 2:00 - 2:30 am.  Sneaky and Big Gray check the feeder every couple of hours -- just to make sure nothing has dropped, I suppose.  Last night, the local black cat made a visit, too.  Besides Sneaky, there are three to four cats I see in the yard from time to time.  One cat belongs to our neighbors kitty corner across the street behind us.  I call him the Daddy Cat, because he's the spitting image of Rossie, and I suspect he's the daddy to our four ferals.  He doesn't eat here.  Big Gray showed up late last year only on the coldest of days.  Now that Moose is gone, I thought I might see more of him.  I've seen the black cat at various times but have never gotten a picture of him (it may not be a him).  He comes from up the street.  There's also a long-haired cat who has made an appearance or two.  That one comes from down the street and may belong to the people two houses down. I think Big Gray will replace Moose sharing the feeder with Sneaky.  He does not defer to her, but they don't seem to have problems sharing the feeder with one another.

The Week(s) Ahead:

• I'm heading to San Antonio for two weeks, so I may miss posting next weekend.
• Exchange the deer feeder for a complete kit (with legs this time).
• Take spare small fridge to a friend of ours who has a use for it.
• See what Mr. L needs help with around the house, so we can get a few things done down there
• Go to RWA Literacy signing on the 25th
• Accompany Mr. L to the Fredericksburg Swap Meet
• Attend at least one yoga class per week (the second class wasn't agreeing with me, I think)
• Water as allowed and do yard work
• Get Lady and Natasha outside time
• Finish Lesson 20 for How To Revise Your Novel; get Polar Bear on the Loose ready for type-in (When ready, are any of you interested in being alpha readers/critiquers for this?)
• I want the first draft of Kitty City (20k) done by the end of the month, so I need to get more words on this
• Give 129 Amselstrasse a critical look

Run-by posting

The Boys are on their computers (well, 2 are, and the other is reading) so I have a few minutes to update. Good reunion so far. Vicky got here Saturday morning, and we spent the afternoon at the Bristol Ren Faire. You've probably seen the pics on Facebook of her and The Baron. :-) Between us, yes, those and the one in Millenium Park with her "cup of Joe" were directed at the ex. She had a blast and it was good for all of us to see she'd landed on her feet. Her process was much like someone who has had a loved one with a terminal illness, who grieves in increments, and when the shoe falls is through the worst of it already. It's not completely over. He's still in my house. Eric and I will decide later how to deal with that, after we've chatted up a couple of lawyer friends. It looks like the options right now are re-do the lease agreements so they're individual and enforce them individually, or just evict him altogether. I like the latter better, although I don't wish him ill and don't want to see him on the street. I just want him away from my child so she can move on. OTOH, I also want to give her every opportunity to handle it herself. There's a lot to be said for having to clean up your own mess. I just don't think he'll move out voluntarily or without legal action. He doesn't have a lot of options; he's barely making any money, has sponged off most of his friends and family already, and even his parents won't have him back.

Other than that, everything is fine. We're doing the tourist thing, watching some movies, more or less the same as every time we get together. Same routine, different city. Everyone goes home Saturday, after which I will crawl into bed and pull the blankies over my head until Sunday morning. I'll catch up with you again then!

American Storm

A lot of unsettling things seem to be going on for a lot of people, both on the personal and the outside the personal realm areas of lives.  I'm strongly tempted to withdraw from interaction for a while.  If this happens, don't worry.  I'm fine.  I should be making scheduled blog posts, but I, too, feel irritated by a lot of what I'm seeing on social media, and reading that Facebook has intentionally manipulated posts in the past to achieve that irritation in members, annoys me to no end.  I'm trying to think if there is any other way to easily interact with family (who don't appear to use other means of social media), but I keep drawing a blank.  I'd really like easily alterable ways of filtering my feed, but I haven't found them yet.  I may have to explore a little, because I do believe it's possible.

It's been an up and down week for a variety of reasons, mostly personal.  Got some stuff done in San Antonio.  Enjoyed the annual Fourth of July gathering with musician friends of Mr. L's.  It's a family gathering for them, but they invite a few friends, and we've been included for the last I don't know how many years. 

I bought a deer feeder this week.  We'll set it up at the ranch and use the game camera to record who comes to eat (I anticipate deer, feral hogs, squirrels, raccoons, and skunks).  This will give us an idea of what kinds of critters are hanging out at the ranch and some numbers to go with them.  This should help me refine my wildlife management plan, but the refinement is going to be to cast a wide net and make the environment desirable for as many critters as possible.  Mr. L seems to think I can't figure out how to do this, so he wants me to wait until he gets back to town to set it up.  I could handle it, I'm certain, but I don't want to take the grief if anything goes wrong, so, fine.  He'll have one more task on his never-ending to do list.  I'm easy that way.

This week saw progress on Kitty City, Episode One, and How to Write A Series Expansion work.  I have made no progress on Polar Bear on the Loose.  This alternating weeks is better than not working at all, but it isn't my goal.

I have the current draft of Blackbirds, and I plan to look for my old poetry this week, but I'm not sure where it is, so I have no idea if I'll find it or not. Then, once I find it, I don't know if it's suitable for the anthology or not -- it's very likely it isn't.  I just don't remember.  It's been nearly thirty years since I wrote it.

We have a mourning dove nesting on a fence post in the back yard in San Antonio.  Mr. L told me this afternoon the chicks have hatched.  Pretty cool.

I've had an adjustable lap desk and matching mouse pad in my Amazon cart for quite a while.  Mr. L has been concerned about how much time I spend sitting, and I have to admit I have trouble standing up after sitting for awhile.  This can't be good.  I've heard a lot of discussion about standing desks.  I put the order through, and I'm going to try using this on my roll top desk to convert it to a standing desk.  With the adjustability, I should be able to set it up at a proper height to see if it helps, and it should be easy to move aside when I want to sit down.

I have ambitious plans for The Week Ahead:

• Pack three pair of shoes to send to my sister in case they'll fit one of her kids (one pair is brand new in the box, but I didn't realize my feet changed size again until it was too late to return them)
• Read Blackbirds and discuss with Stephen.
• Work on Lesson 19 of HTRYN and PBOTL
• Write Kitty City, Episode One, and come up with a name for it (hope to get about half done this week)
• Mow and trim as needed
• Spruce up downstairs bathroom
• Spruce up entry hall
• Clean kitchen floor (this is a never ending battle)
• Clear off kitchen counters (they'll stay clear until Mr. L returns)
• Vacuum
• Recycle newspapers
• Shred
• File paperwork
• Find some things Mr. L wants me to bring back to San Antonio with me
• Write review of Valerie's Majai's Fury and another book I have from Library Thing's Early Reviewer program.
• Find old poetry.

Happy Fourth!

We went to Bill's dad's today for BBQ and family. Was nice, especially my lengthy conversation w/ Bill's brother.

Things are still, obviously, things. Some good, some bad, most very stressful. I'm back to baby-stepping into the WeightWatchers plan (last week - ending yesterday - I resumed tracking, regardless of what I ate I logged it and lost 2.4lbs. This week I'm calculating all points and planning what I can (except for today because... driving, barbeque, family stress, general chaos, etc...), next week, I'm not sure yet. And writing daily (reached the end of the opening in Stain) and babysitting quite a lot since The Daughter has a new BF and two jobs and so forth. Plus the medical things - still awaiting the official decision on the mutinous cyst, for example - and the publishy things (no new declinations for either book, but a friend did offer to handle all the 'BS' of self publishing SPORE for me since I'm so BS resistant, and Endorphins in Blackbirds plus SID in an upcoming new writing/art/music webhub thing, so lots going on there). Plus politics, mostly because Bill's a conservative and I'm a socially-welcoming fiscally-conservative 'let's all just mind our own bidness' libertarian leaning moderate and crap, I am SO SICK of the political discussions in the freaking car, then the HobbyLobby verdict SEVERLY ticked me off (Corporations are not people, they're specifically created to SEPARATE their human owners from personal legal/financial responsibility of lawsuits etc against said corporation so the ruling just makes me twitch on so many levels) but our opposing positions just make car conversations even worse so I've been crying over some nasty facet of poly-ticks every day (my current solution: Remove All Incumbents until sanity resumes, preferably by tar and feathering). Then something, somewhere is pollinating because I'm stuffed full of snot, and the gnats and skeeters are terrible so being outside w/ LittleMiss is its own unique torture. Someone (not me) had the bright idea of letting LittleMiss play in my new sewing machine's packing box, then sat there and watched her peel off bits and strips of cardboard and brown paper bits, and they're everywhere, still. It's like they're breeding, even tho we took the box to recycling days ago. Plus I put myself in therapy because I've hit my limit of self loathing this century, but it's digging up some stuff I really don't want to look at, which makes more weeping... She specializes in trauma recovery, which is exactly what I need, but it's gonna be a tough slog.

So. Anyway. I'm crying quite a lot. Plus I'm full of snot and have gobs of mosquito bites and I'm exhausted and pretty much every single thing in poly-ticks SUCK when you're a centrist.

That's all I can manage. {{hugs}} and have a great week.