She'll Be Comin' Around the Mountain When She Comes

I can't think of any significance for that song for this week's post, but I always liked it when I was a kid.  Do kids still sing that song anymore?  Does anyone?

The Good Stuff:

• It's the first of the month and GI News is on my feed to read.  Have you guys heard about this source of information geared but not limited to Glycemic Index foods?  I think it's based in Australia (because the GI ratings haven't hit the fad level here in the States).  On the first of the month, the post a plethora of articles and recipes and other news of interest regarding health for people interested in keeping their diet low on the glycemic index table.  I don't study it as much as I should, but I subscribe to the feed.  This month has some interesting articles.
• I hauled a bag of clementines with me to San Antonio and didn't eat them down there either, but I decided for the trip back that I would peel them the night before and store them in a zip lock bag.  Then, while I was driving, I would snack on them instead of stopping at Panera and loading up on bagels and coffee before the drive.  This worked well.  (I think clementines may work as a diuretic, though.)
• The grass was crispy when I got to San Antonio but green and happy when I left.
• Rossie was out more with Mr L when Lady wasn't here, and Ruby was much more approachable in San Antonio (even sleeping with Natasha for a lot of the time).
• My dad says his recovery from his hip replacement is going so well, his back doesn't hurt as much as it used to (we suspect because the hip isn't throwing everything out of alignment -- I'm pretty sure he still needs the back surgery, but maybe not as soon).
• If you have a lot of cats and the price of Revolution flea/tick/mite control is way out of reach, my veterinarian (without me asking) suggested I get the big dog dose and pull it out in a syringe and apply it to the back of their neck (use the needle to open the dose, then draw the 4ml out into the syringe, separate the syringe from the needle, press the blunt end of the syringe to the back of the neck, and apply).  For us, one month of big dog dose will dose 8 cats ($15 vice $75 for equivalent cat dosage).  I buy a box of cat and a box of big dog (because Sneaky needs hers too), and they give me two free with each box, so that's good for eight months.  The vet throws in the syringes for me.  The upside is the cats seem to be less bothered by the syringe administration (no air noise like the individual vials).  If you have fewer cats, calculate the right size dog medicine for the number of cats you have, because you don't want to leave the vial open from month to month (at least, I don't).
• I got the filters changed.
• The Equipment Depot checked out the lift and found nothing wrong, but they did suggest a couple of "best practices" to prolong battery life.
• I made a little progress on PBOTL.  The goal was to finish Lesson 17 in How To Revise Your Novel by the end of August, and I did not do that.

The Not So Good Stuff:

• The bed we have in San Antonio does a number on my back.  This morning, even though I'm back on my Sleep Number, my lower back and right hip sent a sharp pain coursing through my body, and it's been complaining a little ever since.  I'll get this figured out yet, but as y'all know, it's no fun.
• Not surprisingly, getting up at 3 am every day to turn on soaker hoses disrupts sleep patterns.  That was very evident on the graph posted to my fitbit dashboard.  Disrupted sleep patterns seem to lead to pain and inflammation in the body.  So maybe I shouldn't be blaming my bed in San Antonio but the getting up at 3 am?
• Books-A-Million in San Antonio only had three of the bargain journals I wanted.  I bought them all.  If I want any more, I'll have to order them online.
• I got what I needed done at the Social Security Administration offices to activate my on line account.

 The Week Ahead:

• Please pray for my sister to get good news on a job she interviewed for (or even good news from an unexpected direction).  She's been out of work since the end of April and is anxious to get back in the saddle (as her severance pay is running out).  She's been thankful for being able to spend time with her family and mom and dad this summer, but she's ready to be back in the employment pool again.  And, frankly, she needs it--even more than she needed this break.
• Find a way to see my husband's efforts at decluttering as just that and not efforts to eradicate all signs that I live here.
• Accomplish some decluttering as well this week.
• Work on PBOTL
• Begin planning for NaNoWriMo (This is the last year I plan to participate -- it will be ten consecutive years this year, and I think it's served it's purpose for me.  Maybe I'll change my mind next year, but for now, that's what I'm thinking.)

The River and the Highway

I don't know what that means.  They're both highways of sorts.  Not in a mood much to interact with the world, but, to a certain extent, I must.  Nothing is wrong, but there's an undercurrent flowing right now that just doesn't feel comfortable.  Despite that downer sounding opening, it's been a pretty good week.

The Good Stuff:

• I seem to have isolated the noise problem on my recumbent bike to the right pedal crank.  It was self-loosening.  I added a star washer and tightened it down.  So far, so good, and it's nice to be riding again.
• We went to Waco to run errands on Thursday, and Mr. L got new batteries for his man lift, and I got a Fitbit One.  I've been using an Omron pedometer for years, and it works marvelously.  Every six months or so, I replace the CR2032 battery, and it continues to count steps like clockwork.  But I'm kind of geeky, and since I've been using Lose It!, they have a capability to link with techie things.  I wanted a way to get my steps recorded automatically, and Fitbit is one of those things that will sync with Lose It!.
• One of the other things I noticed in the article about experimenting one's way to weight loss was the sleep monitoring app. I didn't want to use the app he recommended in the article, but it did prompt me to consider such a thing. (Experimenting my way to weight loss?  Maybe!)  Fitbit, if worn on your wrist while you sleep and activated (press it's button until the stopwatch function kicks in) will track how long it takes you to go to sleep, when you're restless, and when you wake up at night.  And the really cool thing?  It seems to do a good job of doing just that.  I can check the chart it's already uploaded in the morning and find out how much time I was trying to sleep (when I activated and deactivated the timer) with how much actual sleep I got and when it was.  Kind of an added bonus to the pedometer function.  Another nifty feature is it tracks when I walk up stairs.  It seems to count my back steps into the house as a flight of stairs (about six steps), but that's also kind of cool.  It's a hundred dollar "toy" but it's a pretty cool one.   
• Mooch is back to hanging around the house a little bit.  I still don't know where he goes when he's not here.
• I brought the furnace filters downstairs in preparation for changing them.
• We went to a sort of local swap meet this morning (Giddings, TX), and we're leaning strongly to setting up there next year to try to re-home some car parts and stuff.

Not So Good Stuff:

• I didn't change the filters yet
• When Mr. L installed his new batteries and when to complete the circuit, he gets a spark, and he doesn't think that's supposed to happen.  So, much to his chagrin, he still needs to drag the machine out and take it in to Equipment Depot for them to inspect it.  To make matters worse, we suspect this problem may have been there when we bought it, because it never performed the way we expected it should, implying something was wrong in the circuitry.  I just hope it's not outrageously expensive to repair.
• Some family challenges that I have been anticipating came up this week, and we're working them out. Nothing terrible, just not appropriate for a public forum.  Only mentioning it, because it is probably contributing to my feelings of discomfort mentioned above.  Pretty sure everything will work out just fine.  One of those things.
• No progress on PBOTL this week.
• The joint at the base of my left thumb is driving me bonkers. It "catches" on a regular basis, which means I get the equivalent of an electric shock in the joint every time I get it moving again.  It's apparently partially attributable to carpal tunnel syndrome and arthritis.  I have the beginnings of it in my right hand, but my left hand is my dominant hand, so I see it there first.

 The Week Ahead:

• Take four cats and head to San Antonio on Tuesday to carry out watering and various other sundry chores.  Return to Central TX on Saturday. (This plan leaves Mr. L with Rossie and three others in an attempt to continue to draw Rossie out of her reclusiveness.)  Ruby is also more outgoing with me down there, so I'll work with her.
• Go to Books-A-Million in San Antonio (the one in Waco closed!) -- I need more of the cheapie cloth bound little notebooks that they carry.  The ones at Barnes and Noble are $15.95, and the similar things without the name brand are $5.95 at BAM.  I still have several, but I need to stock up on some colors.
• Go to Social Security Administration office in SA and make sure they have correct address and contact info for me.
• Dare I say it?  Work on PBOTL.
• Oh, yes.  Actually change the furnace filters.

Hot Insanity Prep

This weekend is the big international festival in St. Louis. We're setting up the clan tent so we can sweat and get others interested in Celtic stuff. We were supposed to set up tonight, so we drove into the city only to discover that the guy in charge not only isn't going to show up until early tomorrow morning, the plan he put together won't work in the space. He's in very hot water right now. Oh, and he's the Membership Chair for the Scottish Society That Talks A Big Game. Frankly, I'm surprised it's happening at all. I might try to talk Eric into boycotting on Sunday.

Good Stuff:
- I wrote over 10k words this week with one tiny scheduling adjustment and a slightly larger attitude adjustment. I wrote about the attitude on my blog last week, so you've probably seen that already. The scheduling was just cutting the internet out between my bible reading and writing. I hope the trend continues.
- I ran four days this week and discovered adding an extra day doesn't do much for my stamina. Later runs were pretty slow and not as far.
- Story telling went well. I've set up a standing monthly appointment at that retirement home. Some of the ladies remembered me from the last time.
- Alex has made new friends at school. The one he talks about the most is Igor from Ukraine. He's in a lab with all foreign students, which makes me laugh. His school is in rural Illinois, and he's the only American in the lab.
- Got the lawn mowed this morning before it got hot. Woohoo!

Not So Good Stuff:
- STILL nothing from Chicago, but the people in Richmond contacted him again. No, I don't want to move to Richmond, but I will if I have to. It's further from everyone I love. Except Eric, of course. There's another opportunity in St Louis, too, but the ideal is for him to stay where he is if the funding is approved, at least as far as I'm concerned.
- Eric's new semester started. Only two semesters left and then we can be done with grad school forever. Except for Alex's, but we're not directly involved in that.
- The low battery light on the cat feeder came on. It takes 3 D batteries. We have 1. Not only that, but the battery compartment is on the bottom of the feeder. What kind of genius decided that was the right place?
- The cool weather we've been enjoying has gone. Summer is back. At least my tomatoes should be happier.

So I can't say I'm eagerly anticipating this weekend, but win, lose, or draw, I'll probably blog about it on Monday. Hopefully I'll remember to take some pictures. As long as I don't get in the way of the caber toss, it's all good.

On the downside of summer

First off, I'm doing GOBS better, mentally. My doc took me off the progestin and whoa, what an improvement to my mood! I've actually been almost manic ever since. I have a dip every now and then, but I bounce back fairly quickly. Yay for that! Weight loss is stalled tho, mostly because I'm still HONGRY. I am, however, holding more-or-less steady, so I'm trying not to worry about it. Much.

Good golly, I'm hungry, tho.

Laura is working 20+ hours a week, so by the time we add in travel time, I have Little Miss 5+ hours a day, during the day. Since she is very, very BUSY (many comparisons to energetic monkeys come to mind) and I can't turn my back on her for a few moments or else the room/house will be trashed, I'm not getting much of anything done during the day. Plus I have to start babysitting in the morning, so I can't stay up too late (and I'm a night owl) so I'm really not getting enough sleep. It's been challenging cramming housework/sewing/writing/relaxation/etc into a short period of time, but I'm managing. I've been too spoiled being a stay-at-home-mom/screw-off for too long. I dunno how people who work full time get anything accomplished without falling to utter exhaustion.

Been trying to do a smallish artsy quilt a week, ish, and that's working out well, especially since I sew a lot while Little Miss is having visitation w/ her dad. I'd really like a book to work on, but other than a Lars short/novella and the next Dubric book, I'm kinda stuck. I want to do something different. Not sure what, but something.

You all probably heard my good news from last week. The three Dubric novels have sold to a German publisher. Still awaiting final contracts, but it's all supposedly good to go and all parties have agreed. The sale will also pay off the remaining advance for Threads and Valley. YAY!! Very exciting stuff!!

Down to two agents and an editor with the full SPORE manuscript, and quite a few still have partials, plus one partial for Morgan. I've paused querying until the two agents respond. They've both had the book quite a while so I'm very, very hopeful one will want it or one of the agents with partials will want more, or now that the Dubric books are in the black my old publisher might want SPORE. Everyone has been amazingly nice and complimentary, which is a relief.

We had our annual Fireman's Ball here in town this past weekend and I spent the day selling motorcycle 'fun run' tickets and t-shirts. Was pretty fun. Met lots of locals and it's kinda cool that people recognize me and come up and talk to me. I'm up for reelection to city council this November and I've been hemming and hawing whether to run or not (there is quite a lot of BS and arguing involved which frustrates me), but, today at least, I will run. Quite a few people made a point to tell me they're thrilled I'm on the council because I'm *nice* and I listen to *them* instead of pushing my agenda and because I'm working for the whole town and not just my handful of friends or personal preferences. This kinda perplexes me at times because isn't that what representatives are supposed to do?!? Anyway, I need to gather at least 10 signatures to run again and I really don't think that'll be a problem at all.

I don't like the arguing, tho, and I fear a big argument will be coming next meeting because I'm gonna strongly disagree w/ a proposed set of surveillance cameras. I've already warned the Mayor. lol

I think that's about it. I hope you all are having a good week, getting stuff accomplished, and finding joy in your life.  {{Hugs}}

[Insert Song Title Here]

I made it more than half way through the year before drawing a blank on a title.  Better than I expected.  (Who knew the sideways carets would blank out my "blank" title?  I should have.)

The Good Stuff:

• We got the lawn mower repaired for $15.  Not bad.
• I got the lawn mowed
• We got rain 
• I did a beta read on a book for a complete stranger.  I'll be sending out the critique tomorrow (after I've had a chance to review it to make sure I'm not too harsh anywhere but still getting the point across)
• I rode the recumbent bike and got it fully reassembled.  I believe the problem is a bolt on the right hand pedal crank that self-loosens.  I have some Loc-Tite around here somewhere.  I'll find it and apply it to the threads of the bolt and re-secure it.
• I've been eating more fresh fruit

The Not So Good Stuff:

• No work on PBOTL this week.
• Productivity is in the tank for most everything (except riding the lawn mower)
• I think I have a continuous hot flash going on.  Is that possible?
• You've seen the hammer throw in the Olympics?  I think the cats are practicing for it with their water tower.  In fact, tonight I (jokingly) accused Mr L of kicking it over in the morning just so I'd have to mop up a half gallon or more of water when I come downstairs.

The Week Ahead:

• Find Loc-Tite and get the recumbent bike pedal mended
• Work on PBOTL
• Get the downstairs furnace filters changed out
• Replace burned out light bulbs (I think there are two or three to take care of)
• Get the menu planned and grocery lists created.

Still In Limbo

Dispensing with the Good Stuff/Not So Good Stuff today. Most of it feels really ambivalent.

- No news yet on the job in Chicago. The interview went well. He got follow-up e-mails from the head hunters telling him he made the cut, but apparently they're not moving very fast. Then again, they are a veteran-owned company. Jean knows what can happen to people who are steeped in bureaucracy their entire careers. Or maybe they're just super busy and trying to stay afloat while they hire new crew. Who knows?
- I didn't make the cut for the seasonal job. Given my schedule in September, I'd have made the same decision. I can't really say I'm heartbroken to have another Christmas not working retail.
- I got Alex to go through the books he has had since he was a kid, and he identified some others he wants when Eric is done with them. When I got Eric upstairs to approve Alex's selections, I also got him to go through all the hard cover books and between us, we got rid of 4 big bags of books. I also went through my shoes and purged all the sneakers I don't wear anymore, all the shoes I bought for work, and the ones I haven't worn since last year because they were buried and I forgot about them.
- I need to focus on my closet for purging. Tammy, any thoughts on what to do with the tubs of fabric I have stashed? It's not like there's anything particularly good. The best pieces came off the discount table at Walmart, so my quilting friends will not be interested I don't think, but I hate for it to end up in a landfill.
- There's a new restaurant supply shop not far from the mall. They sell in bulk and the prices are reasonable, so we can ditch Sam's. They even have stores in Chicagoland. :-/
- Running is getting a little easier. I got through all of my run intervals on Friday, even the long ones. Not that it's anything to write home about--I ran 3 minutes without stopping and was surprised when it ended because I thought for sure I had another half minute or so. Small victories, right? Yeah...
- Story telling at the nursing home went well. I have one at the other nursing home this week. Really need to spread them out a little.
- Alex went back to school with trepidation. Fall semester has always been harder for him than spring.

This Week:
- Vicky is coming by tomorrow to pick what she wants from the latest Grandma stash. I need to get her to go through the books in her room.
- Usual household stuff.
- Write.
- Purge.
- Exercise.
- Take whatever is left from the Grandma stash to Good Will.
- Holy cow, Festival of Nations is next weekend, not the one after. Let Games Season, Part II begin.

Digestion or Indigestion?

I'm "digesting" this Lifehacker post about Experimenting My Way to Losing 100 Pounds.  I've read the article and opened all the links contained in it and saved them to a Too Many Tabs row.  Stephen, I know you've read a lot of books on this subject.  Have you read any of the ones he lists, and, if so, do you recommend them?  (If anyone else has read any of them, feel free to chime in.)

One thing I'm contemplating doing is ONLY recording the good stuff I eat.  Things that I think will work well for fueling my body.  Why is this?  Well, recording everything isn't working for one.  For another, it may be a challenge to make recording my food diary a positive experience.  Also, if I don't want to record it, maybe I'll ask myself why I'm eating it.  Will that perhaps result in more reflective eating?  Eating for fuel and health vice out of despair?  I dunno.  Then, of course, there's the challenge of (hopefully) watching me increase my intake of good, healthful food.

I'm seeing a mixed message in the article about gluten-free, but I think that message is more for the bandwagon gluten-free foods vice naturally occurring gluten-free foods.  As with fat-free and sugar-free, gluten-free makes up for it with other things not necessarily healthful.  The other message is, unless you have celiac disease, gluten-free isn't necessarily beneficial, and, if not done right, can actually be harmful.  I have an aunt who has chosen to be gluten-free, and it works well for her (she had problems that gluten-free has alleviated).   

His five recommendations in the article were:

• Drink water (or black coffee -- just not frappacinos, etc)
• Eat high protein
• Eat vegetables (fresh ones, I'm sure he means)
• Stay away from sugar
• Stay away from wheat/gluten.

The second and third will help with the fourth and fifth, I think.  Tammy, you mentioned stumbles and getting back up again.  Definitely, that is the way to go.  I'm still trying to figure out how to mesh something like this with a non-supportive spouse.  He's supportive, but only to the point where it doesn't impact him.  I guess the way to do that is, when necessary, cook two dinners.  Then I still have to figure out my part of the deal for me.  I'm still thinking.

Unlike the author who mentions he'd eaten without thought of what he was doing for most of his life, I've spent most of my adult life being "educated" by the military on what their view (the government view) is of healthful eating -- a large part of that was the low fat bandwagon.  That and the food pyramid that apparently one of the authors referenced in the article debunks.

To revisit the wheat and gluten issue, one person has mentioned the "Frankenwheat" discussion of genetically engineered wheat.  Sadly, that appears to be becoming a greater portion of the food selection available to us.  So frustrating.

Rain on the Scarecrow

But none on our yards.  It's been a marginally productive week. 

The Good Stuff:

• We got a good watering on the yard in San Antonio.  I doubt it will last for three weeks until I head back down there at the end of the month, but it was the best we could do.
• Mr. L got pickets painted and a frame assembled for a new gate on the inner side yard.
• I got some work done on Polar Bear on the Loose
• Mr. L had a rehearsal and recording session for the New Braunfels Village Brass band.  I think the CD is going to sound good. 
• Sneaky is doing fine.  So are the other kiddos.

The Not So Good Stuff:

• I had some uncomfortable back spasms last night.  I slept on a contoured pillow last night, and that seemed to help.
• We didn't get several things we'd both agreed needed to get done done while we were down there.  Mr. L is strongly avoiding trips under the house.  I don't blame him, but it has to get done.  If he won't call in a plumber to do the job, he's going to have to go under there and do it. (This is still the tub drain repair, and it's been almost a year that he's been working on it.  Not being able to shower down there is getting really old.) Having someone else do it is not open for discussion.  Sigh.  There are disadvantages to marrying a stubborn man.
  

 The Week Ahead:

• More work on PBOTL
• Yard work
• Resume recumbent bike riding as well as begin reassembly of the shroud (assuming no problem can be found for the mysterious noise).
• Continue doing the stretching exercises for my hip and lower back.  I'd stopped doing them for several months, and that was a mistake.
• Add stretching exercises for my ankles and wrists. (If you have an iPad2 or newer, iMuscle2 is a wonderful app.  It's intended for physical therapists, but it really shows your muscle layout as well as weight training and stretching exercises you can do for each one.  You can customize a workout program as well.)

Befuddled

As usual, I'm trying to figure out where to start.

Good Stuff:
- Ran twice. Couch To 5K seems to be the way to go for me. You jog a little and walk a little, and it gradually increases the run time. I'm running almost a mile now, just not all at once. Next week the runs will be longer.
- Got my eyes checked. They're the same as last year.
- After my eye appointment, I went across the street to the gift shop I applied to before I left for Mom's to follow up on my application. Eric said they didn't call, and it's a good thing I stopped in because she had tried to call. She had a few minutes and so did I, so we did an impromptu interview. It's the first time I've interviewed for a job in jeans and flip flops, but it went pretty well. We know each other superficially because I shop there sometimes. This isn't anything to get excited about, just a holiday gig, but it will get me a little pocket money and an employee discount.
- Got some story work done, more writing than telling. Not enough as far as I'm concerned, but a little is better than nothing.
- Froze the corn Mom sent home with me. In case you're wondering, 1 ear of corn is roughly 1/2 cup. It was the easiest preservation process I've come across yet.

Not So Good Stuff:
- I have to tell stories Wednesday and I don't know yet which ones to tell. This was sort of the point of setting up regular tellings--to force me to learn stories more quickly. It was better in theory than in practice.
- I've been behind the 8 ball all week. Laundry has piled up, dishes have gotten out of control, and I only have a couple more weeks before all hell breaks loose again. Every Saturday and most of the Sundays in September are booked. Yep, the worst of the heat should be done and it's almost Scottish Games season again.
- My concentration is shot. Sleep isn't helping, and neither is caffeine. And I have stories to learn! And another one to write! Aah!

This Week:
- Laundry and house work.
- Tell stories and hope, if I have to recycle one or two, that they've forgotten I told them already.
- Run.
- Write.

Yeah, I think that's it.

home. tired.

Last week was busy, busy, busy. We were up and out of the house by 8:30 every day.

- Tuesday I drove. Stopped in the Kalamazoo area to visit my grandma. She looks great, and at 96, she's sharp as a tack. Got to Mom's late--almost 10 p.m.
- Wednesday we went to have a foot detox. You put your feet in ionized salt water and it draws out toxins. It sounds bizarre, I know, but it did something because the water was gross when we were done. After that, we hit some of the new antique shops in my home town and I found some cool stuff for Vicky for Christmas.
- Thursday was the Family Cemetery Tour. We drove back over to the western side and put flowers on the graves of my grandparents, great grandparents, and several other great great relations. My aunt and uncle met us out there and we had lunch together, which was cool because I haven't seen them since Alex's graduation party. Also on Thursday, my step-dad took his twin brother to the Detroit VA for a lymph node biopsy, and when they did the preliminary blood work, they discovered that his white cell count and uric acid were sky high, which is the perfect storm for kidney failure. They cancelled the procedure and had my step-dad drive him to the VA in Ann Arbor, which has an inpatient oncology ward. Long story short, he'll be there a few more days and they're re-doing all the tests to make sure he does indeed have lymphoma and not something else. They've mapped out a new treatment plan that will include staying in the hospital a week at a time for chemo.
- Friday we went to Meadowbrook Hall and toured the house and gardens. I'd been decades ago, and it was much darker and smaller than I remembered. Compared to the "summer cottages" in Newport, it wasn't too impressive. After that we visited my mom's cousins who live nearby for a couple hours. They were great role models for me growing up and I like hanging out with them. They're one reason I wish I lived closer.
- Saturday we had a hand detox, which was the same as (but grosser than) the foot detox. Then we had lunch with an old friend from high school. My dad came to see me in the afternoon.
- Sunday was church with a potluck, after which mom volunteered us for clean-up. She's the Church Marine--first in, last out.
- Monday I hit the road again, same trip as the week before in reverse. Stopped to see Grandma. She cooked lunch for me. It was cool to walk into her apartment and have it smell like her house used to. Then came the long drive home. At least it didn't rain yesterday.

So that's what I've been up to. Needless to say, I haven't gotten much done today. At least I don't have story telling this week. I have one more week to prep for that. Alex is home, so I guess I'm going grocery shopping this afternoon. We "have nothing to eat," meaning no Ramen, normal pasta, or lunch meat. Poor kid.

Truckin'

Down in SA on mobile access. I'm back to working on PBOTL, and I hope to finish Lesson 17 in How To Revise Your Novel by the end of the month, so I have a good bit of "truckin'" to do.

Saw my eye doctor today. While my distance vision is incremental worse, she saw no need to change my lenses in the glasses I use primarily for reading and computer work. The Progressive lenses go to infinity at the top, so I can wear them all the time if I like (they have clip-on sunglasses lenses).

The Week Ahead:

• Continue work on PBOTL
• Get truck serviced
• Work around the house and yard
• Accompany Mr. L to his recording session on Saturday (even though I'll only be in the way of the band--I plan to stay as far out of the way as possible).

Happy New Year!

Today I went and walked at the gym for the first time in about nine months. I didn't see anyone I knew besides my insurance agent. The gym was mostly empty, although there were a lot of cars in the parking lot. But I didn't go into the basketball court or the swimming pool area, so maybe they were there.

I did okay. I've lost a lot of stamina, but I did walk a mile. I will be back there tomorrow. It's all part of my personal New Year resolutions. (It's my personal New Year because my birthday was yesterday.) Here are my resolutions for my personal new year.

1. Walk at the gym at least 200 times this year. Which, since I walked today, means I only have to walk 199 times more.
2. Take a photo each day.
3. Write 500 words each day.
4. Eat a salad and green veggie a day.

That's it. There are in addition to my regular chores and routines, but it doesn't sound like much. I mean, it sounds like I can do these things. So I'm going to try.

Here's my first photo. It's of an OSU sock monkey that a friend gave me for my birthday.

And here's the second photo. It's me at the end of this very long day.

Yes, I look tired. That's because I am. And I still have a couple hundred words to write before I can call it a night. That’s okay. I find writing – especially when I have no particular goal – to be relaxing. It’s like wandering around outside or browsing the shelves at the library. Just looking about and seeing what catches my interest. Sometimes a poem, sometimes a scene for book, whatever is interesting.

Too many times, I have forced myself to write. I have a deadline. Or I have a project. I need to make money. So I write because I must rather than because I want to. Writing needs to be fun for me. I don’t mind hard working fun or serious fun, but fun nonetheless. I’ve been thinking of writing as a chore, and it’s supposed to be enjoyable. So that’s what I’m working on with these writing rambles. Rediscovering my joy of the written word. Learning how to soar again instead of trudging on the ground. You can get a lot of places by trudging – and no writing life will ever only be soaring – but the miles can be hard on your spirit. They wear you down. Eat away at your soul and your hope.

You would think that particular epiphany would be counter to my resolution of writing 500 words a day, but since it’s writing for me to enjoy – writing for the sake of writing as opposed to any other reason – it’s actually a commitment to joy. Besides, I’ve trudged too long to completely give it up.

So those are my Personal New Year Resolutions. I’ll share my progress with you as the year goes. I hope I keep them. Your support and encouragement will be appreciated.

Ashes & new fires

I'm walking away.

Leaving the black dogs behind in the blackened ashes of old schemes and failed ambitions.

Walking toward Jericho.

No, I'm not sure exactly what that means. Maybe nothing in the grand sweep of time. But maybe something more. Yeah, that's the mood I'm in.

It's not a bad mood. Not a dark mood. More of a reflective one.

My New Year starts Tuesday. My birthday. Another year of life. More failures. More adventures. More successes. More life.

What more could I ask from this world?

What more could I want?

I feel the breath of a changing wind. I feel the ghost of wings on my shoulders. I feel my world open up.

But what does that mean in practical terms?

Well, it means this: Creations 2013: 40 Ways to Look at Love has launched. And that anthology is my creation in many ways. I'm proud of how it looks. I'm proud of my short stories -- two of which are romances! And I'm proud of my poems. I've started to make a little money from it as I've sold the copies I purchased. Not much money, but that little bit of income seemed to open me up a bit. Suddenly it seemed like I could make money from writing. I could complete a project and have people enjoy it. I made my first sale, and I held that little bit of money, and I felt something ... loosen in me. Weird, eh?

And it means Murder by the Mile will be finished this year. Probably by the end of September. I had hoped I would have it done by my birthday, but that's not going to happen. But finally ... finally I believe ... I know I can finish the book. And I can finish it this year.

Undying: Poems of Fantasy and Science Fiction might even be finished this year. Poems have started to present themselves to me at odd times. I had a great time working with Wendy on "Highlands" and might even have convinced her that poetry can be fun. Or at least presented that possibility to her.

This week, I will work on:
- Murder by the Mile.
- Undying.
- Household chores.
- Publicity for Creations 2013.
- And so on.

Oh, yeah, there's a birthday in there, too. Happy New Year!

gearing back up

The 'boring,' such as it was, ends tomorrow. Not much of note has been going on this week.

Good Stuff:
- The lovely weather has continued. It's made running so much easier.
- I'm getting stuff ready to head north. I talked to my mom yesterday, and she does not have every day planned. Only half of them. ;-) That's my mom.
- I'm going to stop on the way to see my grandma. She'll be 97 next month and her biggest complaint is arthritis. She's on her third pacemaker. Just goes to show German stubbornness goes a long way!
- Vicky's car is fixed. There were a few other fiddly bits that needed to be fixed--safety issues like bare wiring and a broken motor mount. It was expensive, but not as expensive as a new car. Or even a used car. She should be able to get several more years out of it with the new engine.
- We were out and about yesterday and went a little crazy. We bought a toaster oven. I know--somebody stop me. The best part was the marked price we $54.99. When we got to the check-out, it was $29.99. I'm thinking about going back to get them for the kids for Christmas.
- Got my hair cut. It's off my neck again, so I'm ready for the return of hot weather.
- Two of my friends became grandparents this week. One lives in Colorado, though, so I'm pretty sure it's not something in the water. At least I hope it's not.
- The second story telling went well, although I got yelled at by someone in another room because I was too loud. I laughed and took it down a notch. I have lived with hecklers most of my life. They don't faze me.
- We saw Red 2 the other day. It was pretty good, although it struck me a little as an homage to Quentin Tarentino. Overkill on the firepower, but it was entertaining. If you wait for it on Netflix you won't miss much.

Not So Good Stuff:
- I'm so scattered right now. It's like I just realized I'm leaving in 2 days, and all the things I have to do to get ready are cascading on me.
- I ordered some new running shoes from Zulily, and they aren't due to get here until 8/7. I didn't realize that the reason they offer things at a discount is because they take orders, and then buy in bulk, and after it gets to them, they ship to the customers. So, yeah, the price was great, but I would have liked to have taken them with me. First world problem.
- Even with the realization that I have to write scenes that aren't going to be in the book, word count was low. I'm hoping to figure out the rest of my middle this week. I'll take the iPad and some notecards with me, just in case I have a quiet hour on the deck. It could happen. Just have to put Mom down for a nap. :-)
- My Uncle Carl--the one with non-Hodgkins lymphoma--had some problems with his blood work last week. I don't know all the particulars, but it appears that he has cancer cells in at least some of his lymph nodes. He's having a biopsy Tuesday. Prayers for him and his twin brother, Carel (my step-dad), are appreciated.

This Week:
- Pack, drive, visit.
- Be nice to my brother.
- Get some exercise, even if it's weeding Mom's flower beds.

Have a good week, y'all. I'll be late next week.

Back to the Island

Yep.  We're back on our little island in Texas.  Land-locked, of course.

The Good Stuff:

• I got all the properties mowed this week.  I still have weed whacking and shrub trimming at the Central Texas house to do.  Everything else is done.  Whew!
•  Stephen and Holly both released anthologies this week, and I'm pleased to have been able to purchase both of them.
• We survived and enjoyed the Grant Tour 2013.  It went pretty well.  Mr L was the model husband at my class reunion.
• Easy slow cooker recipe:  Package of country pork ribs and your favorite BBQ sauce.  Mix well, cook on high for six hours.  Tender and tasty.  I roasted a couple of ears of corn to serve with it, but you can do whatever works for you.  Leftovers nuke up nicely.
• I pulled PBOTL out of the drawer before we left on vacation to make sure it was front and center when we got back.  I also committed to finishing Lesson 13 of HTRYN by August 31.  I began working on it last night.
• I was worried about Sneaky while we were gone.  While there was no sign of her in the afternoon when I got back to town, by 9 that night, she was at the parlor window begging for attention.  Mr L had suggested I turn the side porch light on for her.  I did.  No idea if it made a difference, but we're going to choose to believe it did.
• All the other kitties survived two weeks at the vet.  Natasha danced in excitement in her cage when I walked in the door (boarding cages are in a vestibule in the front of the clinic, so everyone gets to see the kitties when they come in).  Ajax began pacing in his cage.  Everyone else looked at me like I'd subjected them to the most horrible experience possible.  Natasha, Lady, and Tarzan have been at my side since I got home.  Everyone else has resumed normal activities.

The Not So Good Stuff:

• We got rain in Texas while we were gone, and a tenth of an inch last night here in Central Texas.  We need more.  San Antonio is planning to go to Stage 3 watering restrictions for the first time ever.  If San Antonio goes, Alamo Heights (where we really live in SA) will be right behind them.  Generally speaking, if we can get through July, the grass will do well the rest of the year, and I think we'll be okay, but the larger issue of water in South and Central Texas is a growing one.
• Mr L was greeted by a jury summons in the hold mail after we got home.  He was not thrilled.

The Week Ahead:

• Work steadily and regularly on PBOTL
• Finish catching up the yard work
• Make sure I get exercise and stretching (left ankle and right glute are giving me trouble)
• Stephen, I hope you have a wonderful birthday.
• Prepare to head to SA for a couple of weeks next weekend.

TIme keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping...

Somehow the weekend  got past me, although I did think about y'all yesterday. That counts, right?

Good stuff:
- The story telling went well. I wasn't out of the building before at least 1 resident asked the staff to have me back, so I'm scheduled to go again next month. I have another session in another facility this week. The only thing I would have changed last week was a cooler costume option. The AC wasn't very effective.
- I found tomato plants at Home Depot. They're not the heirlooms I wanted, and they were getting to the point of needing to be re-potted. One in particular was pretty puny and I'm hoping it will make a comeback.
- Between running and walking, I did about 10 miles last week. The shocking part is that I'm not sore. My knees twinge a bit on the stairs, but that's about it. I guess that means I have to push more.
- Because the humidity has been driving up the temperatures, even early in the morning, I decided to try running on the treadmill at the Y this morning. I think it went all right, and I did like that it figured out all my stats for me so I could log it easily. I still got super sweaty, but I cooled down a lot faster.
- For various reasons, I found myself out and about a few afternoons this week during my low ebb time. As a result, I spent less time in front of the TV snacking.
- Between the reduced snacking and increased exercise, I dropped a couple pounds. Funny how success breeds motivation.
- My fencing teacher has gone back to doing drills with me instead of the free-for-all bouts we've been doing. In these drills, I'm either attacking or defending, so I can see openings better. The best part is I'm not so bruised!
- July birthday shopping is done, and I did a little Christmas shopping while I was at it. Honestly, I think I could have done almost all of Vicky's Christmas shopping on ThinkGeek.com.

Not So Good Stuff:
- We managed most of last week with one car, but this morning 5:45 came awfully early. Driving in with Eric at 6:15, I was praying for an engine. Not sure I've done that before. I don't remember thinking, "This sucks," so many times in an hour before. Hopefully we'll get Vicky's car back in a few days.
- I got more words in last week, and I thought I might make my weekly goal, but then I ran out of plot. Drat! I've backed away a bit and started reading James Scott Bell's "Conflict And Suspense." Hopefully it will help me to increase the drama level so I can sail past the muddle in the middle. Resisting skipping this and moving on to the end, which is what I've done several times in the past and have ended up with pieces of stories.
- My 'boring' time is drawing to another temporary close. I leave next Tuesday to visit my folks in MI. I'm sure Mom will have the week jam-packed.
- I signed up for a session with the personal trainer at the Y last week and he hasn't called me yet to set it up. The gym area was closed two days last week so they could install new equipment, so maybe he's just behind, but I've had communication issues with him before. I followed up this morning and the people I talked to thought that sounded unusual. I told them I'm giving him until Friday to set it up or I'm asking for my money back. It's not like I need a lot of his time. I just need him to set up a game plan for me combining the cardio and weight training. I think I could figure out how to use the machines on my own if he would just tell me which machines, how much weight and number of reps.
- I learned that one of the gals in the praise band has serious mental issues. I thought she was just high strung and tense (like Chihuahua in a past life), but it turns out she has a genuine mental disorder and doesn't think she needs medication. She's been increasing inappropriate with staff members to the point that she's been told via certified mail to stay away from one of the pastors, and she thinks she's being persecuted. She's left the church and I want to tell her I'm praying for her, but I'm afraid she'll imprint on me. That would be really bad. I'm such a mother hen and it's gotten me into trouble, so I know as much as I want to, I can't have contact with her. It's just sad.

This Week:
- Increase my run time and push a little harder.
- Get words in, for heaven's sake!
- Read. I'm going to have to work up stories for next month.
- Get my hair cut. It's too hot to have hair on my neck, and it's not long enough to put up yet.

Have a good week, guys!

Oh dear

Oh dear, it's time for another post where where I list my accomplishments last week ... I don't even hear crickets ... I do hear mosquitoes, though. My area is clouded with those bloodsuckers. I went out to sweep my front porch and made the mistake of wearing shorts. I killed six on my legs in just a couple of minutes. Went back inside and put on protective gear. Sweep front porch.

Cleaned house yesterday, too. Killed a depressing number of spiders. Probably not dangerous, but I don't like them. I know people who will capture them and set them free outside. I squash them. This is probably bad karma.

My roomie's oldest grandson spent Saturday night and most of today with us. He's a lot of fun. And so smart. I played Jeopardy with him on the Wii. He did great. I was amazed how he could figure the answers out. Smart boy. Loves to read. Is reading the Percy Jackson books now.

The anthology for the writing group has been published and shipped. It should go on sale this week, probably Thursday. The cover turned out nice. I'm pleased with it.

This week:
- Continue to work on Murder by the Mile.
- Chores.
- Haircut.
- Doctor visit, which I dread.
- Start walking program again. Going to have to pay for a gym membership. Something about the gym kept me exercising.
- Plan writing group meeting for this coming Saturday.
- Filing.

And that will be my week. Hope you have a great one.

Roll On Down the Highway

Or, in our case, the railway.  This will catch up last week and this week, in case I don't get logged in on Saturday or Sunday.

The Good Stuff:

• Had a good reunion. Out of a class of 230 (with about 200 of us still around), we had thirty attendees with a few spouses.  Apparently, we didn't have the "usual" group (obviously, since I attended!), and there were several people who, like me, either hadn't attended before or hadn't attended for a long time.
• Was able to touch base with a few friends in the Washington, DC, area.  
• We planned this trip well (see below).

The Not So Good Stuff:

• If it could be delayed on this trip, it was.  In fact, this trip has been a comedy of delays, from the three hour delay out of San Antonio while we waited for the other half of the train to arrive from LA (among other things, they were delayed by a freight train being hit by a vehicle), to the re-route around a straight-line wind freight train derailment in western Ohio that took us all over Ohio before finally getting us into Pittsburgh eight hours late.  We left Pittsburgh about half an hour late but arrived in DC on time only to not have our class of car available, but we got two levels upgraded for only $10 more a day (and got the vehicle we really wanted in the first place, which we couldn't have gotten if we'd tried).  We'll see how the rest of the trip goes, but it's been amusing so far.  We planned for things like this to happen when we built the trip, so everything really worked out to our advantage, but other people weren't so happy.
• We were unsuccessful in finding a laundromat in Falls Church, VA, (the hotel didn't have guest laundry facilities), so we washed out a few things to see us through to the end of the trip last night.  When it was still damp this morning, I was using the iron to get everything as dry as I could before we checked out of the hotel this morning. Mr L, in attempt to dry one of my new bras over a lamp this morning, apologized and showed me the hole that burned into it.  I had to laugh.  The lengths some people will go to to obtain that "Peek-a-boo" look.  Really.
• I had a lot of trouble with the extended walking this week (my pedometer said we walked 7.5 and 8 miles respectively, so I don't feel quite so bad).  I pulled out a folding cane for yesterday, and that helped a little.  I also remembered to take some Aleve yesterday to augment the Tylenol.
  

The Week Ahead:

• Enjoy the rest of the trip (New Orleans)
• Mow the lawn in SA on Tuesday
• Head back to Central TX on Wednesday to pick up the kids from boarding (I hope the place is still standing)
• Mow the lawns in Central TX
• Begin, in earnest, decluttering in the house
• Begin teardown on my recumbent bike to determine what parts I need to repair it (Mr L may ask me to wait for him to get back before I do that, so it could be delayed)
• Establish a walking and riding program to increase my stamina in preparation for our October trip.

Trying not to be a mess

Hey.

I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel the weepies nibbling at my edges and there's no good reason for it. We're all fine.  Laura found a part time job - she starts Tuesday! - and interviewed for a couple more jobs, plus she's dropping off an ap for a full time one tomorrow morning. That's all excellent. Bill's been getting a *little* overtime, just enough to pad the check a smidge, not enough to wear him out. Little Miss is getting over a misc fever/infection thing that's going around the kidlets, but other than mostly sleeping and whining for a couple of days, she's back to her normal energetic and chatty self. Pets are all fine. Got plenty of groceries. I lost 3.2 lbs last week (that's a 43.2 lb loss so far, only 6.8 until I get my 50b charm!) And even the querying stuff is going all right.

Maybe it's because I'm not sleeping? I dunno. I'm in bed 5-8 hours a night, but I feel like I spend most of it tossing and turning. I'm eating okay (been REALLY HONGRY!!! though) and walking 2 miles or more a day. I just don't know. But, maaan, I really want to CRY!

And, yes, I am taking my Vitamin D. I never, ever miss my Vit D.

Tidied up my sewing space this evening and sorted out some fabric to start a table runner for my friend Trina, but my heart isn't in it. I read what I have for the next Dubric novel (about 25k) and found it 'meh' at best. I know what happens next in both main storylines, but really don't give enough of a crap to write it out. I had another request for a full for SPORE, and a request for a partial for Morgan, plus five very, very nice declinations. So nice I want to send thank you notes. But that's not appropriate, I guess. I have about 4 loads of laundry to fold and put away, but I have zippo ambition to do it. Probably ought to clean the kitchen, especially the under side of the microwave, it's kinda greasy/sticky, but again, zippo ambition.

My doc put me on progestin to help control some of the PITA preimenopause symptoms I'd been having, and I'm not as itchy (definite YAY for that!), but it's the only thing I can think of that'd impact my mood so strongly. I can't think/focus, can't sleep, and all I want to do is either sit and do mindless stuff (like play stupid FB games that I don't even like) or eat or cry. And I'm trying not to eat or cry. So I sit and waste time and energy on mindless crap.

Gah!

I take the last pill in this month's series tonight (might just go ahead and skip the dang thing) and I'll see her again in 2 weeks. Maybe things need adjusted? Maybe I should just deal with the OMG ITCHINESS and insomnia (itchiness better, insomnia NOT, and my libido has taken a definite dive - sorry, Stephen, that was surely TMI, but GAH!!!). If my problem isn't the hormone pills I don't know what I'm gonna do. Maybe it's my age. Maybe I'm not getting enough protein. Maybe it's just the world's cracking apart with hatred and crushing the weak and helpless while greed and power run amok without end and I can't stop worrying about it. I dunno.

I can't go on like this, though. And it's not a black dog, I've had the black dog, this is not the same at all. I'm not pulling anything IN, not running endless tapes of self loathing through my head, not blaming myself for anything, nothing like that. This is just endless, quivering SORROW. And it really sucks.

I hope you all have a good, safe, happy week.  {{hugs}}

So quiet...

The Boys have gone home. Alex went back to college today. Let the boring begin! I have about 2 weeks before I head to MI for a few days with the parents. I did see on Facebook this week that Southwest Airlines is starting non-stop service from St. Louis to Grand Rapids, MI in August. That's on the west side, and my parents are on the east, but the fares are cheap and I could rent a car, go see Grandma (on the west side, less than an hour south of Grand Rapids) and head east. Pretty excited about that prospect and it will be a great option if I have to get up there in a hurry.

Good Stuff:
- Obviously, the best part was that the Boys were here. We saw quite a bit of Vicky, too, considering she was back to work and school last week.
- We went to see Despicable Me 2, which I thought was very cute. No one else was too impressed. The plot left a lot to be desired but it was funny.
- The Egyptian exhibit at the Science Center left a lot to be desired, too, but it was geared more for kids. It would have been great when we first got here and were homeschooling. The movie that went with it was better.
- I got Danny and Greg in the back yard with the practice swords. That was entertaining! They were scared to hit me. I actually had to give them permission and promise to hit them back. Danny went with me to fencing class yesterday and got one on one instruction. He went in November, too, and learned the basic attacks and defenses. He's been shadow fencing for six months. The problem with practicing alone is that you don't get hit in your weak spots, so you practice them, too. He has a better idea now of what to work on, and I encouraged him to look around for a combat fencing group in his area. With instruction and regular practice, he could kick butt and take names.
- I got a call from a lady I met when I went to talk to the nursing homes about story telling. She's moved to a different facility and called to ask if I would come there, too. They have a breakfast one Saturday a month, and the soonest we could agree on is November, but I'm good with that. The exciting part is that she called me!

Not So Good Stuff:
- I gained another 5 lbs. That puts me within 6 lbs of my delivery weight with Alex. It's time to get serious again about logging food and stepping up the exercise. The Couch To 5K app has been downloaded to my phone, and Greg and I are going to run a 5K when he comes back for Thanksgiving. I need to lose 10 lbs, but I'm shooting for 20. I have jiggly bits that have never jiggled before and I don't like that!
- The only writing I've gotten done in the last 2 weeks was to flesh out a plot bunny. In true form, I got my ideas down and started research. After a little preliminary reading that allowed me to tweak the idea a little, I started looking on Amazon for resource material before I remembered that I have a book to finish first. :-P
- I have my first nursing home story telling this week and haven't started practicing. I do have an idea of what stories I want to tell, but some of them I've never told before.

This Week:
- Watch calories and exercise.
- Rehearse for story telling.
- Write. Need book words. My dreams are getting more bizarre by the night.
- Laundry, dishes, etc.

Last but not ... well, mostly just last

How are you? Good, I hope. I hope this coming week is good. Mostly I worked on MBTM and did chores last week. That's what's coming this week. Writing group meeting on Saturday. Finishing the anthology. That's about it.

Thought I would share a post from 51313 Harbor Street. Don't know if you read it. But this post ... it's still how I feel right now.

Bitter

Sometimes I get bitter. Angry at myself. For my past decisions. For all things I did and have yet to do. The blind mistakes that hurt people. The loves I lost for not loving enough or loving too much. The financial mistakes that I compounded by making more.

After a while, you begin to doubt yourself. You become afraid of doing anything because you can't see beyond your actions; the unintended consequences branch out of control.

It's an illusion, you know. Control isn't possible. We have such power, but not the wisdom or the foresight to use it safely.

Eventually you end up motionless. Paralysed by the unknown. You can plan. You can scheme. You can hope. But ultimately you cannot know what comes next. Only the fools rush in. Or those blinded by their desires. And you no longer have the comfort of blindness.

That old saying. "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." It carries more wisdom than we want to acknowledge.

So we sit, powerless. Perhaps complaining. Perhaps in ignorance. Perhaps in sorrow, but we sit. Trying to see our way clear of the morass of bitter knowledge.

Don't you ever wish you didn't know what you do now? Do you ever long for those blissful days where you strode through your life as if you owned it? When failure seemed so unlikely that it never ended into your mind? When it seemed like the sun would forever shine on your innocent heart?

I do. God, how I do.

On the Road Again!

Yes, we're heading out.  Hitting the rails.  But, first, the week in review:

The Good Stuff:

• Yard work is done.
• The vet had our reservations.
• Bills are paid (and I found a little extra to tack on to my annual donation to my favorite charity)
• Mr. L is so fun to watch while he prepares for our train trip.  He's nearly giddy with excitement.  For two weeks, he's been saying, "This time, X, we'll be X."  He has everything packed and repacked and inventoried. It's the only time he allows himself to relax, because he literally cannot do anything else but ride the train.  No matter what other work he "should" be doing, he can't do it, because he's on the train, so his brain lets him relax.
• Sneaky's food feeder is loaded, the batteries still appear to be in good shape (they're supposed to last a little over a year), and she has fresh water in her water tower.  She should be set for the duration.  Mooch has been hanging around.  I followed him when he leaves, and he appears to go in the direction of the house my mailman indicated he may have belonged to (but that man moved to Temple to an extended care facility a couple of months ago).  I'm not certain is the new residents of the house do anything for him or not.  He cuts through a driveway on my street to appear to go one street over.  I not about to walk through someone's yard to follow a cat, so I'll have to keep an eye in that direction.  If the opportunity presents itself, I'll ask.  While on a short walk last night, I noticed several kitties in yards and on porches.
• Did a little more filing this week.

The Not So Good Stuff:

• I'm still at a loss for what to write while on the train, so maybe it's brainstorming time?
• Since Mr. L left for San Antonio, Ruby has been out and about quite a bit.  I'm beginning to think she doesn't care for Mr. L.  Of course, Rossie avoids me at all costs, and she will only talk to Mr. L. So, I guess we have parity.  Floyd runs from Mr. L about half the time.  Delta seems to like us both.
• My Air only has 15G of free space on it (64G SSD -- I was afraid this would happen).  I may not be able to get it to last until 2015.

The Week Ahead:

• Capture all the cats in the morning and get them dropped off at the vet for their boarding.
• Try to get a little walking in on extended stops on the train.
• Survive my class reunion.  I haven't been to one in twenty-five years (I went to the tenth), but a lot of us have gotten back in touch via Facebook (we have a private page for our class) .  People I barely knew have turned out to be interesting.  One even lives in Universal City (a suburb of San Antonio), and we're going to see each other for the first time in forever at the reunion.  Maybe he and Mr L will find something in common?  Who knows.  I'm sure all will go well.  I get nervous before any outing with people, no matter how much I like them.  (Even you guys, to a certain extent.)
• Enjoy time with Mr. L, riding on the train, and exploring the town I went to high school in.

back from WI

Just popping in for a sec since I have a house full of company and I have to get downstairs shortly to get my part of dinner going. We spent the weekend at the Bristol Renaissance Fairre in Wisconsin. A good time was had by all and we didn't spend as much money as we thought we might. Vicky went with us, sans the boyfriend, so she got good bonding time with the Boys (aka The Uncles), including getting tossed around in the swimming pool last night. I found a bard cup and a stout walking stick. Now all I need is rehearsal time and I'll be ready to tell stories in the nursing homes.

The only fly in the ointment is that I bought a leather vest for Eric yesterday, and USAA thought it was fraud since the company is based in PA. I appreciate their diligence and I can't get mad about it, but it's taken two tries to get my card unblocked. I've had similar things happen before and it has been fraud so it's worth the trouble. At least I don't have to contact all the people who debit my card on a regular basis to change the number. Again.

That's about it from here. I'll get pictures from the ren fairre up on my blog tomorrow. I'm pretty brain fried right now. Looking forward to a good meal and my bed. Have a great week!

I can't possibly be first

Hey everyone.

I'm fine, we're all fine, I hope you're fine too. And that you all enjoyed the Independence holiday.

I've been trying - and mostly failing - to stay offline because so much of the oppressive political power grabbing garbage gets me all upset lately. Oh well, in time this shall pass, or I'll learn to ignore it.

I'm still trying to get an agent for SPORE and maybe Morgan (sent 18 queries this past week) but no nibbles yet. Since I need to work on something, I dragged Dubric out of the trunk today so I can poke his old carcass with a stick.

We're all in the lingering stages of respiratory viruses but improving every day.

Been trying to simplify things, get rid of stuff, and generally clear out the crap, but I'm not doing very well at it.

I'm already tired of this heat. Gah.

I hope you all have a lovely week! {{hugs}}

A Subplot Too Far

I felt much better about Murder by the Mile after I decided that there would be at least one more book. I was trying to wrap all the subplots mentioned and developed in the first two books, and the goal was making the third book clumsy and lumpy. I was trying to shoehorn everything in, and it just didn't work.

Sounds weird, but by removing about 10,000 words and several scenes, I'm back on schedule. Yeah, I know. I wouldn't thought it, either.

This isn't a promise to write the fourth book, but it is an realization that I don't have to wrap everything up. Life doesn't.

Otherwise, not much else to tell you.
- The new anthology from the writing group is on track. It should publish in the middle or end of July. If you'd like a copy, you can get a signed one from me for $12 plus $3 for shipping. Let me know.
- MBTM should go to the proofers on August 1st. I'm aiming for an official publication date of September 1st, but it should be out sooner than that if all goes well.
- Undying: Poems of Fantasy and Science Fiction should go the proofers on September. It's "official" publication date is October 1st, just in time for Halloween. These poems quite dark and unnerving. Or at least my first readers have found them so, and that was my intention.
- Got a lot of chores done. Been using my 20 List again. Has helped a lot.

This week:
- Continue to work on MBTM.
- Enjoy the 4th of July.
- Chores.
- A doctor's checkup for my diabetes.
- Continue the diet and be better at it.
- Swim in my little pool a few times.

Hope you have a great week.

calm before the storm

No literal storms. Just company, but they might as well be family. They've seen my house at its worst. In fact, they've contributed to the worst, so it doesn't really matter if the house isn't perfect.

Good Stuff:
- I lined up two story-telling gigs at nursing homes in mid-July. I'm working for experience right now but told them that may not always be the case. I haven't forgotten the CD, Stephen. I've been pestering Eric to burn it. Tammy and Jean, if you want a copy, you might want to speak up quick!
- I'm just about ready for Danny to get here, and his flight arrives several hours later than I thought it did. He gets in late enough that Eric can come to the airport, too! Bonus!
- Went to a book signing for Tosca Lee and Ted Dekker. They've released Sovereign, the 3rd book in their trilogy. They were super nice and insisted on having their picture taken with everyone. It was so inspiring to meet them. They write Christian fiction like I want to write. If you haven't read their work, you're missing out. I'd recommend starting with Tosca's "Iscariot" and Ted's "Blessed Child."
- The book signing bonus was that I got to have dinner with Vicky beforehand.
- Little Eggs (aka Khan) seems to be adjusting well to his new home, and Jeli hasn't beaten him up as far as I know. He's an 'in your face' kitten, or as The Boyfriend calls it, 'all up in your Kool-Aid.' He apparently picked that up at work. It makes me giggle.
- Fenced yesterday. Some of the bruises have developed, but the outside of my left knee and thigh are still very tender, which is a shame. It's cool enough to wear jeans but they rub against the tender bits. Want to see pictures when they do develop? :-)
- One of my fencing friends is going to the same Ren Faire we're going to next weekend. Hopefully we'll find him and he can meet Vicky and the Boys.
- Kids are doing great. Alex is working and doing research hours at school this summer, and the doctor he's working with may have some influence on getting him into a good PhD program. Vicky got all A's last semester and is thriving in her clinical training. She's at St Louis Children's Hospital for another couple of months, and then hopefully she'll be back at St Louis University Hospital until she graduates. They loved her there and she hopes that and her work ethic will get her a job there. Both kids will be on their own after Christmas. (In theory, anyway!)
- We got the lawn mowed this afternoon, and an hour later it was raining.

Not So Good Stuff:
- I didn't come close to my word count goal. Not that I expected to, but it would have been nice.
- Alex's plans changed and he won't be home until next week, so it's Danny and me all week. Eric is working 10-hour days so he can leave early Friday. I have some stuff lined up to do and I'm hoping Vicky will come hang out since she's on her one-week break from school.
- The military has started shifting things around again, and some contractor positions are moving to other bases. So far we're safe because the base the IT jobs are going don't have the facilities or infrastructure to do what Eric does, but he's expanded his search area East to Chicagoland. Not thrilled about that, but it does have a few advantages. It's all so fluid right now there's nothing to do but pray and wait. The thing that bugs me the most about having to move for the job again is that I figured the next time we move, we'd go someplace we want to go and I'd be excited about it. Whatever the case, I'll keep you posted.
- No positive movement on the weight. I cleared out a bunch of shorts that are too small and put them aside.

Grateful Stuff:
- That we have this safe place to vent. There are things I can talk to y'all about that I don't talk about with local friends or family because I don't want them to freak out and ask me every week about it. If I told my mom there was a possibility that we'd be moving to Chicago, that's exactly what she'd do.
- Temps are supposed to be unseasonably cool for the next couple of weeks. That will make Chad (from WI) much more comfortable.
- Despite that stormy weather and local flash flooding we've had, our house is standing and dry. So is Vicky's.

This Week:
- Hang out with Danny.
- Get ready for the Ren Faire next weekend.

Have a good week, y'all!

Window on the World

Nothing earth-shattering about that title.  Just observing we all have our own little windows on the world, and they are sometimes interesting.

The Good Stuff:

• Rossie has been interacting more with Mr. L (she won't give me the time of day).  At least, that's what he tells me, and I have no reason to doubt him.  The good news on that is their progress from their time in San Antonio has not been wasted.  Don't misunderstand, this cat is still very reclusive, but she seems to like Mr. L and responds pretty well to him.
• Sneaky will come upon to the heat pump duct work when Mr. L calls, but she's not quite ready to let him rub her ears.  I think that will come.  I've seen her out and about in the yard more during the day, and I like seeing her there.  Mr. L acknowledges we have nine cats -- he made sure I was willing to acknowledge it, too.
• I ordered and received a new lower chute for the riding lawn mower this week. I mounted the hardware on it and installed it on the mower this afternoon.  The original one had dropped off a couple of times and caught the edge in the blade, resulting in a hole that directed grass clippings onto my leg as they rose through the chute.  Thankfully, I was able to find the right part on Amazon, and it arrived quickly.
• We met with the ranch foreman for the new owner of the ranch next to us this morning.  They do plan to replace the fence between our property and theirs.  They didn't want anything from us except to be good neighbors and let us know what their plans were. We discussed a few things, but that was pretty much it.  We're happy to hear they are going to run cattle on the land.  To us, that's the best use of the land.  There have been a few people who have wanted to develop the land out there into other things, and that's not something we're anxious to have happen.  Cattle are good.
• Began work on filing paperwork and sorting through some already filed paperwork this week. I sent most of my Amazon receipts to the shredder pile.  
• I have made a conscious effort to snack on more fresh fruit and vegetables this week, but I didn't try the new recipe I was planning to try yet.
• I designed and implemented a form for FM authors to submit their publication information to be included in a listing Zette will design. It seems to be working well.

The Not So Good Stuff:

• I feel as if I've been very unproductive for the last several weeks.
• I had to go back to the dentist for the third time to take new impressions for my crown.  The first time, the lab never got them.  The second time, the lab wasn't happy with them.  We hope the third time is the charm.  I specifically backed up the appointment so I wouldn't be going on vacation with a temporary, and, yes, that's what I'm doing. Luckily, I went in Thursday to get the new impressions done, and when the put the temporary back on, the dentist had to grind it down a little for it to fit right (I guess there must be a little adhesive building up inside the temporary, so it didn't seat the same).  By Thursday night, my tongue had found the sharp spot left on, so I went in first thing Friday morning to get it smoothed out.  This was important, because they are closed next week for vacation, and I'll be gone for the two weeks after that. I know I didn't want to spend three weeks feeling that sharp edge on the temporary crown. (So the good stuff in that, is I won't have to. Another good thing is the dentist is right here in town, so no extra driving to get to him -- unlike my medical doctor who is 40 miles away.)

The Week Ahead:

• See if I can put together something writing-related to do on the train.  I still love the idea of train as writing retreat, and I want the writing time I do on there to be worthwhile
• Double check with the vet to make sure I made the reservations for the cats on the 8th (this will pretty much max out her kennels, so, while I'm pretty sure I did, I want to make darned sure--she can make them all fit, but still.).
• Pay bills before leaving for vacation.
• Continue working on the paperwork reduction actions.  
• Yardwork calls.  Of course.
• Seems like there's something else.  Not sure what.  Oh, well.  Y'all have a great week.

I'm late, but I didn't have a computer. :)

Back from vacation and it was awesome and relaxing and soooo romantic and quiet and just great! I even read almost half of a book (Jodi Picoult's The Storyteller) since we were rained in most of yesterday.

I ate too much VERY yummy food, but I'm okay with that. I'd planned on it, and I'm back on WW tomorrow. :) If I gained, I gained. Totally not a problem.

SPORE.

Um.

The Agent wants the book to be more CDC shutdown military involvement media thriller. I want an intimate story of two people facing bad and scary things. Those two goals aren't really compatible, so we've agreed to let me go out and try to find another agent, but I can, at any time, come right back to them if I want to write more of a Big Blockbuster Event kinda book.

So I spent a day going over my previous queries (from Morgan's full and Spore's partial) and sent a new Spore Only query to three agents and my old editor's boss at Bantam.

One agent responded almost immediately with a request for the whole book, and another, while we were out of town, for a partial.

So that's where that stands.

Otherwise things are pretty much the same. I'm on the last dregs of my cold, but really, stuff here is pretty good.

{{hugs}} all around. I hope everyone has a better week.

Rock 'n' roll

Coming in even later, but here I am. Beat up emotionally and creatively, but still standing.

Murder by the Mile is kicking my butt in ways I never imagined a book could do. I've often thought of  chucking it and writing completely and moving on to something else -- maybe painting. I've always wanted to try painting even though I can't draw a straight line. But this book ... in places ... it's the best writing I've ever done. It's closer than anything I've ever written to realizing what I saw in my head. So I keep slogging on, driving myself through the emotional mud, telling myself each and every freaking day that I don't have to finish the book, don't have to worry about the next chapter or the next page ... all I have to do is to write one page. Just one page a day. Just get 500 or so words on paper. Edit those words. Read them aloud. Search for signs of where the story's going to go next. Try to figure out how to get there.

I try not to think this -- but sometimes I think this book is the make-or-break on my dream. If I can't write this well, if I can't finish it, then it's time to give up. Find another dream. Or not. Just live my life day to day. Find an empty job and work until I die or retire. After all, I worked 18 years at a job that meant only a paycheck. I can do it again.

Just to make my cake poison-sweet, the black dog sits on my shoulder almost daily, sometimes hourly. Everything is a struggle. Getting out of bed, getting dressed, taking my meds ... it's hard these days. I've been through this before. It will get better. The doctor will give me the right pill. I'll wake up one day, and the weight will lessen. The moon and the stars will align. Who knows, but it will get better. That's how it goes.

Anyway, that's what's happening my life these days. Hope things are going well for you.

Last week
- Did chores.
- Received proof of the newest anthology for the writing group. Needs some minor changes, but overall, it looks good.
- Worked on the book.
- Conducted writers group meeting Saturday.
- Swam in my pool twice. The water is almost too warm.
- Watched the birds on my front porch.

This week
- Chores
- Revise cover and enter corrections on anthology.
- Work on MBTM.
- Swim three or four times.
- Watch the birds.
- Eat more salads and veggies.

Have a good week.

Rhythm of the Blues

Coming in a little late.  I had intended to post on Saturday, then Sunday, and now, well, I'm just late, so I'll get 'er done!

The Good Stuff:

• All the cats are back home.  So is Mr. L. Rossie ventured to join Mr. L in bed their first night back, and Lady beat her up. He says he didn't see Rossie last night.  
• After disappearing for two days somewhere in the house, Ruby reappeared last night and spent part of the night wrestling with my feet. She has a hiding place in the house that we can't find. It's as if she teleports, because we can't find her anywhere, and then she's here. I'm thinking there are kitty secret passageways in this house.
• Got the dusting and vacuuming done. Knocked off several long time to do list items I'd been procrastinating on.
• Adjusted the blades on the riding mower yesterday.  They still aren't quite right.
• After being fooled into letting Mr. L rub her ears on Saturday evening, Sneaky has been more circumspect about him since then.  He's working with her.  The ear rub queen will soon figure out he rubs good ear and will fall to his charms.
• While this isn't really good news, I received some insight from a friend this week on why I may be stalling with writing.  If I can't figure it out, it pretty much kills my aspirations of being an effective writer,  but I can figure it out, I should be able to move forward.  I'd been suspecting something similar, but my friend put my thoughts to words and confirmed from personal experience the potential consequences and why it can be an issue. 
• We are packed for Grand Tour 2013 (East).  We have one large bag to check.  We decided to pack a bag within a bag in case we find any goodies we want to bring home on the trip.  We've managed to do that before and had to buy a suitcase.  This time, we're bringing the extra suitcase just in case.  If we don't need it, no big deal. If we do, we're ready. We have two small carry on bags and the electronics (Mr. L's laptop, tablet, and printer and my MacBook Air and iPad).  My CPAP fits inside my carry on, so that means one less bag to lug (but it can also come out if we need more space, because it's medical equipment and doesn't count against carry on).
• Everything arrived for my class reunion "ensemble," so that's ready to go.

The Not So Good Stuff:

• I, too, am ten pounds from my highest weight, and am not particularly pleased with my direction.  Unsurprisingly, this coincides with feeling really crummy physically.
• I have not managed to throw anything out over the last week.  I've rearranged some boxes, but I must get better at actively getting rid of stuff.
• No writing progress unless you count the insight gained above.

The Week Ahead:

• Keep chipping away at stuff to declutter.  The efforts can't completely be equivalent to rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic.
• Yes, I'm doing all the yada, yada stuff.  It, thankfully, has become like making the bed.  I do that everyday and don't report on it here.  I guess that's the good news.  
• Getting the yards ready for us to be on vacation for a couple of weeks.  Mowing, trimming, watering.